Best in Show: Holiday Horrors (Pt. II of II)





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5. P2
P2 isn't the most memorable horror film. But, with a fantastic concept and a terrifically loony role for Wes Bentley, this Christmas horror movie should be anything but forgettable. This typical obsession-slasher movie follows a corporate woman working late on Christmas Eve who becomes entangled in a cat-and-mouse game with a security guard blocking her in a parking garage. Things transpire with typical horror conventions but the resulting film glows with holiday cheer and is an entertaining addition to any yuletide playlist.



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4. Black Christmas

Whether deciding on the campy, spooky original or the somewhat grotesque remake, Black Christmas is a practical go-to slasher film for the season. Neither are masterpieces and both have some great aspects, and some really bad ones. But, while the bad is glaring, the good provides enough jolly holiday fun to make them more than worthwhile. The original's use of horrifying, telephone breathing and the remakes obscenely terrifying killer provide the perfect reminder that while these movies are definitely reserved for a certain time of the year, they will always be scary. 

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3. Better Watch Out

One of the best Christmas horror movies out there also happens to be one of the newest. Starring a cast a fantastic young stars, Better Watch Out is a twisty slasher brimming with the essence of the holidays. The visuals are lush, the lights warm and the bloodshed gory. All of it culminates into a perfect experience with funny, but intense results. Better Watch Out deserves the fan base it's rapidly collecting because it's a spirited and captivating holiday horror film that knows how to work its simple premise. Better Watch Out is now streaming exclusively on Shudder, a great move for a great movie.







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2. Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale

Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale is probably the most outlandish film to make this list. Odd, but actually scary, this comical Finnish horror flick is reminiscent of the worlds of Guillermo Del Toro, but with an undeniable locale-point of view. Rare Exports is now streaming on Prime which makes it all the easier to see for those of us who may have missed it on its first rounds. Full of festive undertones, brimming with sweater-adorning characters and really, really scary elves, this holiday movie is a blast.

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1. Krampus
While maybe the most typical option and the more famous out of the others, its negligent to ignore how polished Krampus is. Never taking itself too seriously, the film is full of campy scares, jovial comedy and overall high quality entertainment. Not only is it an effective holiday flick, it’s also a terrific horror and comedy one too. With characters that are unlikeable, yet lovable, elves as creepy as those in Rare Exports and plenty of odd baubles and trinkets that come to life, the ever-charming Krampus is a masterful blend of cinema.



Best in Show: Holiday Horrors (Pt. I of II)

The holidays can be a pretty fun time. Whether gathering around a tree or lighting the menorah, we're constantly reminded that this is a time for family and to resonate on all the things we're thankful for. But, for some, the season is a reminder of how terrifying their family is. This week's list covers the best holiday horror movies. On it, there's a notable absence of Gremlins, simply due to the overly fond memories held of this movie as a happier, campy children's film. The rest of these flicks are most certainly aren't meant for kids and will add an adult flair to an otherwise typical family theme found on Hallmark and Freeform. So without further ado, happy holidays! May they be as horrific as they are in these films.



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10. The Children

Cheesy and sometimes annoying, The Children gets plenty wrong in its attempts at making a horror film about a gaggle of youngsters who turn on their parents. The adult characters, and especially the one teenager unaffiliated by the strange happenings, are all pretty one dimensional. But in some ways, this makes the bloodbath that much more fun. The Children never really makes hearts beat faster, but it does provide a few good laughs and plenty of jovial moments with psychotic children doing exactly what one could expect. 


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9. The Conjuring 2

The Conjuring 2 is a terrifying horror sequel. If this was a list on modern horror movies, it would even be placed higher. But, what is often overlooked is that this film is actually a holiday movie. Taking place during the holiday season, even featuring Christmas decorations, The Conjuring 2 has even received (sarcastic) confirmation from creator and horror icon James Wan that the follow up of the fantastic original is, in fact, a Christmas horror movie. Even without many references, this movie is about family and its themes are reminiscent of those shared during yuletide celebrations. All that's missing in this generally not-about-Christmas-but-most-definitely-is-about-Christmas horror film to push it up this list is perhaps some more sparkling lights.

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8. Body 

Want to lose the Christmas spirit? This indie-thriller following a trio of girls who accidentally push a groundskeeper down the stairs of a house they broke into is just the kind of darkly mean-spirited flick to halt any thoughts of Santa or elves. Intense and void of any joy, Body would best be reserved for those who hate holiday fun. While the movie may have some disturbingly comedic moments, the ever-grim Body definitely isn't for the faint of heart.

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7. Orphan

Often forgotten on the list of Christmas-themed horror movies is Orphan; a film that takes place almost entirely around the holiday season. With perhaps one of the most iconic plot twists in modern horror, it's easy to forget how holiday-driven Orphan is. From scenic snowfalls and warm interior tones, to a Christmas tree and presents that matter later in the film, Orphan is a must-have inclusion for any jolly horror fanatic. Like many of the movies on this list, the themes go deeper than the setting and décor, featuring a family that must stand together or be ripped apart.

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6. Wind Chill

Before she stars opposite her real-life husband as a mother who must keep her family safe from a supernatural danger attracted to noise, Emily Blunt first starred in a little horror film called Wind Chill. Following two classmates who end up stranded on a "scenic" route during their trip home for the holidays, Wind Chill is an on-the-fly tale reminding all of us to be thankful for all we have, no matter how we got it or where we are. Wind Chill could have easily been a terrifying survival film, but when it ties in ghostly elements, audiences will certainly find plenty to appreciate during the holidays, given the sad lives of the road's previous victims.

Review: The Elf

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After the beaming success Krampus, it seemed only realistic that viewers would receive plenty of yuletide horror, whether they wanted it or not. After all, while not the first, Krampus encapsulated everything holiday horror could and should be. It featured plenty of laugh-out-loud moments, some good scares and a hilarious cast. The fact is horror films set on Christmas should never be taken as straight up genre fare. Unfortunately for The Elf, the only things not taken seriously are the filmmaking and acting.

Following a young man who discovers a haunted elf toy among items he inherited in an old toyshop, The Elf makes clear attempts at copying the successes of classics like Child's Play with very, very little success. Built around the man's night terrors surrounded by his return to his hometown, this film makes little effort to clarify, establish plot points and create in-depth characters; opting instead for tossed in features from better films.


The Elf stars Gabriel Miller (Manifesto) and Natassia Halabi (Born to Be Blue) as couple, Nick and Victoria. They're flanked by a host of supporting characters playing family members, car accident survivors and an awkwardly portrayed trash friend. Each is pretty much universally bad. Miller and Halabi have the chemistry of a two pieces missing from different puzzles and neither is very good at pretending to be afraid or courageous. Neither seem fully damaged enough to garner sympathy, either. But, while the acting by the two main stars is bad, the supporting cast though? It’s much, much worse. As noted, there's some pretty flat characters meant to add fodder to the kill count, but probably the most worthwhile to rip on is Victoria's trashy urban friend who was clearly an actress's really terrible character choice.


Other flaws in the film include the dialogue, props, score and visual effects. The dialogue is disingenuous and more like a bad Lifetime movie, although that would be an insult to the cheesy entertainment of those flicks. The props seem desperately placed together; mismatched furniture, time pieces and garage sale finds, making for something less eclectic and more blaringly cheap. Then there's the overuse of sound and music to attempt to create atmosphere and visual effect failures that could have easily been avoided using a still doll. All of this creates a truly unpleasant time.


It's not as if this movie shouldn't exist. It should - if only as a reminder that no matter your goal, whether it be financial or emotive, creating a film needs some sort of core heart. The Elf is not joyous or enjoyable. It's a miserable and unfunny feature. It's missing in The Elf. This film is offensive to the eyes of fans, terrible resume builders for the cast and crew and deserves little to no acknowledgement past discussing its eventual tossing in the trash. 0 out 10.

 

Review: Better Watch Out

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At what point is it too early for the holidays to consume our lives? This is a question asked by people across the United States almost immediately after Halloween. The Christmas creep - that quickly expanding period of time at which commercial winter takes over retailers across the country - is officially upon us. So then the question becomes for horror fans specifically: what can we watch to join in the festivities? Sure there's a few great holiday horror films out there (they'll get a list of their own in December), but for fans looking for movies that are just casually Christmas themed, options are limited. Which makes the release of the wild Better Watch Out even greater.


A Christmas film at its core, but one that could transpire at any point in time, Better Watch Out follows a babysitter who must protect her charges during a home invasion. Without giving much away, this film isn't what you'd expect and the twist in the story accelerates the film's tension and its quality. Better Watch Out stars Olivia DeJonge (The Visit) and Levi Miller (Pan). It also features supporting roles for Ed Oxenbould (The Visit) and Aleks Mikic (Secret City).


The standout of the film is undeniably Miller who portrays the seemingly innocent and somewhat immature Luke, a kid just beneath where he could viably watch himself. Then there is DeJonge who especially impressive as the young babysitter prepared to move into a new chapter of her life and Oxenbound who plays the whinier friend of Luke well. If it had been said that the young stars of The Visit would break out into absolute horror stardom, it probably wouldn't have been that surprising. But, it doesn't take away from their fantastic turns in this new film.


Better Watch Out is bonkers. While not necessarily scary, there is a plethora of entertaining scenes, dialogue and of course, deaths. There is a youthful atmosphere to this film that recent releases like The Babysitter attempted to capture but with shakier results. Each character is visibly having fun in their roles and it makes the movie a joy to watch. Better Watch Out plays out a twisted and swerving plot that never lets up. It's entertaining, gory and offers a feast for the eyes. 


No one needs to wait until Christmastime to see Better Watch Out. Even with its terrific overflow of string lights and gaudy decorations, the furnishings of this film are blissful background to fantastic characters and an insane story. There's no shortage of jovial fun, but it's also just a really effective thriller with a young and vivacious cast. Better Watch Out glows brighter than all of the colorful lights that adorn its setting. 8 out 10.